(no subject)

i've been getting a headache everyday the past few days. i think i'm falling apart.

someone found me on friendster and i'm not sure how. i haven't talked to this girl since the 10th grade. weird.

(no subject)

i feel like shit. i'm just tired of my life. we need to hire some new people quick because i'm sick of working on 5 different projects and not being able to get any of my regular shit done.

they're giving me a new job position and with it comes a raise. supposedly the new title starts tomorrow but who the hell knows when i'll get the money. james sort of lags on that. promising things and not really getting to it until weeks later.

i miss retail life sometimes. the irregular hours and having the freedom to ask for a night off so i can go see a show. i miss going to shows all the time. but with that comes a lack of finances and i need money more than anything. school starts in two weeks. i hope i can get into the classes i need. i just want to finish. i want to find a way and some time to get into the audio production thing. but i don't even know where to begin looking for any sort of intership or anything. i know there are a lot of studios in oc. but again with the no time to do that.

i briefly considered scrapping all of that, starting over and becoming a music major (piano). but then i came to my senses.

i still want to be a rockstar.